Accept

"The best thing we can do for ourselves and the people in our lives is to love them unconditionally, forgive them without reservation and to accept them exactly as they are."
Iyanla Vanzant

Do you love unconditionally? I beleive that most people never encounter unconditional love except when they are infants. When we get to be toddlers, we hear "Do this because it would make Mommy happy". Our parents expect us to live up to their idea of what they want us to be, and we learn how to treat others from the way they treat us. But this leads to resentment when people don't feel free to be who they want to be. We all want to be ourselves, and be loved for it.

Do you forgive without reservation? Most of us go through our lives attached to at least one person we haven't forgiven. We keep remembering the terrible thing they did to us, and probably reminding them of it too. Some of us simply stop talking to the other person, perhaps for many years. That's the worst thing you can do, for how can there be any explanation or discussion of what happened if nobody is talking. When you do discuss these things, you often find that they were an honest mistake or something the person didn't intend to do or to hurt you by doing it. Then you can forgive easily and both of you can move on to have a better relationship and/or do things that are more beneficial.

Do you accept people exactly as they are, faults and all? Most of us wish that the people in our lives would behave better. We wish our teenager would tidy up his room, our husband would take us to the movies more often, and our neighbour would be more quiet. But everyone has faults, that's part of being human; and their faults are part of their individuality.

Even if you love other people unconditionally, forgive them without reservation, and accept them exactly as they are, you must apply this to yourself too. After all, you are just as deserving and worthy as they are. Do this for both yourself and for the people around you. That way everyone wins.

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